Wow! That was dull, pointless, and a waste of everyone's time.
Scenery? Boring. Companions? Dull. Mythology learned? None. Deeds accomplished? Zilch.
Called to help rescue a lost group of dwarves who have decided to recreate golems, the warden arrives at the caves alone. There, she meets her first companion, Jerrik Dace, aka Mr. Expoisition. They wander through caves. Sometimes the PC pushes a button and the caves change color. Occasionally, this opens a new door into another cave room. Lots of interchangeable enemies attack, most of them highly resistant to magic, which is kind of a nuisance for a mage warden.
Along the way, the warden meets some new companions, eventually resulting in a company consisting of the warden, two dwarves and two pathfinding problems. One dwarf specializes in exposition ("It's spooky in here." "They've all been torn to pieces!"). This is not the useful sort of exposition that might point out somethign the player missed; instead, he spouts these lines after the spot marked "bloody footprints" or whatever has been clicked. The other dwarf is insane and gibbers occasionally to remind you that this is actually a deeply spooky place, not the set of rather dull caves you persist in seeing. The pathfinding problems are a "runic golem" and a bronto (which looks rather like a rhinoceros). They are very good at hitting things, which does make up for the magic problem, but they also have footprints about twice the size of average and persist in getting stuck in corners and having to be eased out.
There's some random loot in various chests. Some of it is handy against the final creature, but that's the extent of its interest.
Ultimately, the final battle is fought, and the game ends.
Yay.
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SPOILERS BELOW, though really, you might as well read these and spare yourself the game.
The worst of it?
It's all quite pointless
All but one of the
people you've ostensibly come to rescue are dead and dismembered
before you get there because why would you want a quest you could
succeed in? Heroic deeds are so last year!
The exposition dwarf persists in thinking that creating Frankenstein monsters is a good idea and mourns the loss of the notes and furnace, so no lessons learned here.
And then an "ironic" cutscene plays in which you see a whole lot of the really annoying, troublesome, evil creatures you fought at the end coming out of the mine entrance. So, you know, everyone is dead.
Honestly, Little Shop of Horrors did the same thing in 1986, and it had singing flowers. I have no idea what Amgarrak's excuse is.
The DLC's that are *part* of the game are awesome. This? Bleh!
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