Thursday, December 18, 2008

The Dangers of Social Networking

So I settled down to do some Christmas crafting & thought I'd catch up on some Doctor Who (I've barely scratched the surface of the pre-Eccleston era) only to have Netflix tell me that my connection was so slow it would be 7 hours and 33 minutes before I could watch The Caves of Androzani.

Not to worry, I have a stash of Avengers episodes,1 three seasons worth, so I broke those out, refigured out how to use the antiquated VCR, and sat down for a pleasurable spell of watching Steed golf and learning all about the evils of social networking. Seems trusting large organizations with your social life has never been a good idea.

Quick-Quick Slow Death (1966) featured a dance studio where the thoughtful director kindly encouraged her clients to talk about their lives. The lonelier they were, the more sympathetic she was, often giving them special, private lessons that culminated in a ball where the socially isolated clients were quietly slaughtered and replaced with carefully trained Soviet agents, primed and ready to take over their identities.

It gets even worse if you want a date. Murder Market (1965) featured an unusual marriage bureau that used careful psychological profiling to match clients with their ideal mates. Along the way, and for no extra fee, they also matched potential murderers: Anyone who wanted someone murdered could trade victims with someone else, thus avoiding all suspicions. The bureau also handled weapons disposal.

It's a dangerous world out there.

1Yes, another show where the BBC unforgivably destroyed large quantities of the early seasons.

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